When I started this blog, I posted about how important it is to embrace your natural hair in order to love it and feel comfortable with it. I know that doesn’t come easy for everyone, which is why it’s important that you’re absolutely sure that this is the journey you want to embark on. It’s easy to say you’re all in and then feel overwhelmed once the process really starts to happen. Trust me, I’ve been there. When I big chopped I LOVED having the super short hair and being able to wash and go and not having to fuss with my hair much, if at all. Then it started to grow. Slowly. It seemed like it took forever for it to grow to the point where I could do twist outs and I became frustrated, but I stuck with it. I loved my fro, and I loved my natural hair.
I’m saying all of this because I had a doctors appointment recently where the nurse who was taking care of me complimented me on my hair and asked me what I do to maintain it. She then related that she had been natural for a year but keeps her hair covered up with wigs. She knows that’s not good either, and I told her “Yes, you need to let your hair breathe.” She wanted to know what products to use and how to style her hair. I began to tell her what I use which is natural, organic oils and butters. I told her to rock a twist out and she said “But what if I want to go out and I want to straighten my hair? Other naturals tell me to stay away from heat though.” I said “Yes, it’s best to try to keep the heat out of your hair, but there are those who flat iron their hair or straighten it with a straightening comb. That’s totally up to you if you want to do that, but know that heat can be damaging.” Then she kept saying that she thinks natural hair looks good on other people but not herself.
That’s when I told her that she has to give her natural hair a chance because she’ll never embrace it and learn to love it if she’s always covering it up with a wig. I encouraged her to rock her fro and rock it with some big hoop earrings. Again she stated she was scared that it wouldn’t look right on her. <PAUSE> How on earth does ones natural hair not look right? This is what relaxers and straightening combs have done to us. We don’t even know that our natural tresses are beautiful because we’ve been brainwashed to believe that only straight hair is beautiful! If I had more time to talk to her, I would have asked her WHY she went natural to begin with. Did she do it because she thinks it’s “in” right now? Did she do it because she knows it’s what is healthier for her? Either way she’s struggling with accepting her natural hair and that made me feel…sad.
If I had the time to speak with her a little longer I would have encouraged her to do her research. Go to YouTube and look for how-to videos of how to care for, maintain, and style her hair type and length. I also would have encouraged her to research and educate herself on the different natural and organic oils and butters that are excellent for our hair and scalp. Education is key to loving your natural hair. I can’t stress that enough. I did a ton of research before I went natural, after I went natural, and I continue to do research now that I’m three years natural. Never stop educating yourself about your hair, but before you take the plunge into the natural world, educate yourself as much as possible. Find out your hair type. Some people hate hair typing, but for me it helped knowing my hair type(s) because I quickly realized that I have different grades of hair in my head. It will also determine what products and oils you can or cannot use in your hair.
Finally, once you’ve educated yourself, it’ll help you to embrace and appreciate your natural hair for what it can and cannot do. Not all hair is meant to curl up and be bouncy when you walk. Not all hair is going to hang freely. Just because a product says it’ll make your hair curl doesn’t mean it’s true for your hair. Take the time to get to know your hair. Once you do that, you will learn to love, embrace, and appreciate your natural tresses.