Monthly Archives: May 2014

My Fro is BACK! And a Moment for the Soapbox……

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Afro Unleashed

First and foremost the braids are gone and my afro is BACK! It feels good to feel MY HAIR again. I have missed my afro these past three months, and my has it grown! It only took two hours to take down my Senegalese twists, and the rest of the time was spent detangling, washing, conditioning, and oiling and plaiting up my hair. The above picture is how it looks today. There’s some serious shrinkage happening in that picture too, but that’s the life of a naturalista! My plan is to get braids again at some point, but I’m not sure when. We’ll see.

SOAP BOX MOMENT……soap box

There have been some interesting topics posted on some of my favorite natural hair blogs on Facebook. One of the topics was about the Natural Hair Nazis who believe that wearing weaves, wigs, or braids (where synthetic or human hair is braided into your hair), is NOT being natural. First off, I want to know who these people are that wrote the Natural Hair Rule Book For Black Women and where I can purchase said book. The last time I checked, NO ONE has any say so on what another woman does with her hair BUT that woman! These natural hair “purists” kill me trying to dictate and determine what makes you natural or not natural with their very judgmental “rules” and ideas.

It’s not easy for everyone to be natural. Let’s just get that out there. Some of us naturalista’s have to put a lot of time and effort into our hair because of the grade ofย  the type of hair, the climate we live in, and whatever time we have to devote to the care of our hair with our busy lives. I don’t think I’ve met a nautralista yet who can just get up and go with little to no fuss with their natural hair, but that’s not to say that their not out there. When you factor in hair type, climate, and your own personal daily schedule, sometimes it’s simply easier to throw a wig on, or have a quick weave or a sew in weave. Sometimes it’s easier to have braids put in for a few months at a time. These are also called Protective Styles. They protect our hair from constant manipulation, the elements outside (harsh winter cold, hot summers), among other things. So using these alternatives are not bad nor are they breaking any ridiculous unwritten rules.

Bottom line, none of us have the right to judge another person on how they decide to wear their natural hair or what they put in it. Just because I’m natural doesn’t mean I look down on those who still get relaxers. Just because I’m natural doesn’t mean I get to sit on my high horse and dictate what being natural should mean for ALL women. I’ve stated so many times throughout my blog that we all have our own reasons, stories, and journeys that led us to becoming natural. Regardless of our reasons, I will continue to be supportive of all naturalistas and an advocate for natural hair. Embracing your natural beauty and natural hair is a beautiful, liberating thing. ๐Ÿ™‚

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It’s Time to Celebrate!

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Champagne glasses

April through June mark various milestones in my life. April 2nd, 2013 is the date of my very last relaxer. April 19, 2013 is when I officially decided to go natural. May 13th is when I let my husband’s barber do my big chop. This coming May 28th is me and my hubby’s 20 year wedding anniversary. I cannot believe it’s been 20 years when I can remember us dating, being engaged, and our wedding day like it was yesterday! All of these milestones are huge and are near and dear to my heart. Besides marrying my best friend and having 4 beautiful children, going natural was one of the best decisions I’ve made in a very long time.

I think back to when I decided to go for the gusto and cut off all of my hair. I did it without a second thought and never felt an ounce of regret after doing it. I was ready, I was fearless. My inner strength came out in a big way because I felt so strong and confident about my decision to take this huge step in my life. I was so excited about this new chapter in my life that I felt like I had to share my journey with the world, so I decided to blog about my experience. My hope with this blog is to inspire and help others. When I see family members and countless friends going natural it warms my heart. It makes me over the moon happy to see them embrace their natural hair, to embrace the hair they were born with. I LOVE swapping ideas, suggestions, hair styles and techniques with them. I love sharing and learning new homemade, natural concoctions that are good for our hair. I also love finding various natural hair care blogs on Facebook and on the internet that talk about everything from techniques, do’s and don’ts and what’s good and not good for our hair. I love positive blogs that are encouraging and invite you to share your ideas and suggestions.

It’s amazing that a year has already passed since deciding to take on my natural hair journey and blogging about it. It’s been a fun ride with ups and downs. The toughest stage for me in all of this was my in between stage. That was when my hair wasn’t long enough to do a twist out or much of anything else to other than wearing an afro. That was very frustrating, but not to the point where I wanted to give up. Then my hair went on a growth spurt and before I knew it I was twisting and plaiting my hair and my afro was huge! I felt like Pam Grier, lol! “Freeze suga!” Was that Foxy Brown of Coffee? That’s a topic for another time. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Last but not least, May 28th will mark 20 years of blissful marriage to my handsome, ridiculously funny, stylish, sweet hubby. Marriage is hard work. HARD WORK. We were very young when we got married, but we knew what we wanted and we knew we were ready. We’ve been friends since grade school. He was best friends with my second oldest brother, his big sister was best friends with my two older sisters, our moms knew each other and were friends. We basically grew up with each other – but we couldn’t stand each other either! Typical right? The person you can’t stand end up being the one you marry. I didn’t see it coming to be honest. Apparently in 7th grade he told my brother that he was going to marry me. He didn’t tell me this until we were engaged. How cute is that? Till this day my brother loves telling that story of how my husband told him all those years ago that he was going to marry me. ๐Ÿ™‚ Our marriage produced four beautiful children, two girls and two boys and they are the joys of our lives. Our oldest son will be graduating high school this June, another big milestone for our family! I still can’t believe we have an 18 year old…… sheesh!

All I can say is that we are blessed. Through the good and bad times we’ve been blessed to have life, each other, a roof over our heads, food in our stomachs, and a little change in our pockets to take care of our babies and make them happy and comfortable. I wouldn’t trade my life for the world. I wouldn’t trade the struggles either because those things made us stronger as a couple and as individuals. It made me love that tall drink of water even more. ๐Ÿ˜‰ That’s what marriage is about – working through the good and the bad, sickness and health. Sickness and health especially. We’ve had our fair share of scary moments with sickness and to be where we are today – it’s all glory and praise to God.

Thank you for taking this journey with me. Thank you for your continued support. Thank you for allowing me to get mushy over my lover husband as our 20 year wedding anniversary approaches! There were a lot of doubters, a lot of nay-sayers and HATERS when we got married. People said we wouldn’t last, they said we were too young and didn’t know what we were doing – and yet here we are 20 years later still madly in love and still going strong. What on earth could be better than that? Oh wait…..I know! Me going NATURAL!! HA!!!! ๐Ÿ˜‰ *Just kidding*